Wednesday, February 08, 2006

"Every Member a Match Maker"

Every once in a while all roads, all stars, all ducks, line up in a row and lead you towards something, in my case...marriage talks. Our entire Stake Conference on Sat-Sun, 2, 2-Hours sessions, were on marriage, and introuducing our Stake Presidency's tag line,
"Every Member a Match-Maker." Actually, I was not offended by any of it, and felt the spirit, and the sincere spiritual preparation behind their message. So, the funny thing is, I have just started being "righteous" jk, and going to institute, (24-30 class), and this week, the 2-hour message was on marriage! A big group from our ward go to this institute class together, and we were like whoa! That makes 6 hours of marriage talks in...4 days!

Amongst us singletons there is always the debate of effectiveness of such messages, although I have to give it to the Stake Presidency, they said they knew this message was for many of us like, "nails on a chalkboard," and its true this message can cause anger/frustration/disappointment/ect.,ect.,ect., I guess for me it leaves me wanting marriage more, and then hopeing and questioning if it will make a difference in the guys...at all.

11 comments:

Scully said...

Seriously, I would have wanted to walk out of there. It is offensive in the fact that it subliminally tells women like my aunt or her friend Glenda that they aren't working hard enough when both of them have been in relationships where they were ready to commit, but the guy flaked out on them. If they want to push the righteousness of marriage, push it on the guys. Or maybe take a different route and focus on the fact that you shouldn't let society dictate your perameters for dating. Like appearance. Sorry, catch-phrases like that just angry up the blood.

Esperanza said...

No committment out of your aunt's man yet?

Sherpa said...

I remember one bishop's special message to the sister's called "dealing with disappointment." He was really nervous giving it, but it was the first time i ever thought I might be single all my life. That was a weird thought.

Scully said...

No, E, no commitment yet. And it is driving my mother crazy because my aunt will call my mom and tell her how Jon was disappointed that she re-upped her lease for 7 months to save money, but he won't do anything about it. She has lived in CA for 2 years now. Shouldn't he know by now? And oddly, Ruby G, I've never NOT thought of being single for the rest of my life as a possibility. Maybe I'm just too cynical.

Esperanza said...

Dealing with disappointment? That is a discouraging topic! I always assume I'll get married, but those types of messages always make me shake in my boots!

SJ said...

Well, you know me, I was completely annoyed with losing two hours of my life to that. All I have to say is "a little less talk and a lot more action"

I would also like to add the cruel title of a book my mother wishes I would read, "Maybe he's just not that into you" and a book I wish every woman had, "Maybe I'm just not that into you either".

Sometimes I look at the guys and I think, "This, this is what I've got to work with?"

Scully said...

Exactly, SJ. Plus, with demographics being what they are, with more females surviving childhood and adolescence than males, plus the fact that males are more likely to go inactive, plus the fact that females of a given age set are (usually) more mature than the males of that age set, plus the prevalence of fairly antiquated gender role theories among our religious culture and you really have to wonder why we spend so much time obsessing over it. And I don't think you need to read that book. I believe the title says all you need to know.

Esperanza said...

Panini made me read her copy of that book, and it is actually really good/validating, because it takes on the opinion of your too good for him, he's a loser, not "you lame girl who is hanging on, this is what you do wrong."

SJ said...

I would like to add that I am not diametrically opposed to the idea of marriage, just the weirdness of the dating "game"

Honestly I think I've come to the conclusion that I just don't care to put myself out there, that it happens when it happens and in the meantime I'm decoupaging maps.

Scully said...

Amen, SJ. But I'm scrapbooking plans and magazine cutouts for my (very, very) future house. Because I want to by a house withint the next 5 years. Regardless of marital status.

Esperanza said...

I need to take some tips from you guys, I'm still pining over men... :)